Dependence

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/b1/Purgatoire_in_Alban.JPG

I said I want independence, which is not quite true. I want to avoid dependence.

I do not pursue independence, but flee dependence. Where there is interdependence in my society- I am entitled to ask for X- I do not wish to ask for it. I would rather be separate. Nor do I want to negotiate interdependence. I do not see that I can. All this is a bad thing.

You might think I am beating myself up, but that is not quite it. I would rather be otherwise, but I have just about ceased to blame myself for this, or be ashamed of it. I seek instead to diagnose- to see- to sympathise- to enter in to my own desires- so to accept myself rather than in a semi-conscious state to reject and seek to force myself to be otherwise. Freed from that impossible task-master which is that semi-conscious self, I-

will see what happens, and have faith it will be better than this.

Meanwhile:

The pool of Hirosawa
 Its waters never intending to reflect:

The moon, itself never meaning to be reflected.

The pond of Hirosawa.

An illustration of no-mind, from John Teramoto’s translation of Genwa Nakasone’s commentary on the twenty guiding principles of karate. I thought it a beautiful thought, worthy of poetry but prosaically expressed. Try the 5.7.5 pattern:

Moon without intent

Water without volition

reflects reflection.

Mmm. “Pond” is a one syllable word, which might do. “Will” is a one syllable word for intent. I would like to refer to Hirosawa:

Moon and pond, unwilled

reflected and reflecting

Hirosawa's pool

Here is another translation:

The moon has no intent to cast its shadow anywhere, 

Nor does the pond design to lodge the moon: 

How serene the water of Hirosawa!

For your delectation, some haiku of Basho:

the moon: 

I wandered around the pond 

all night long

So, I mourn the thought of free will, and crave the state of no-mind. Good job I don’t have to be consistent!

2 thoughts on “Dependence

  1. In the poem “Blitz on Clydebank, 1941”, the Scots poetess Naomi Mitchison examines the relationship between dependence, independence and interdependence. She states at one point that we are ourselves, our souls are our own, yet we are held by others we know and events which surround us and impact upon our lives. I believe none can say fairer than she did in one stanza;

    As now, I am thirled* to trust
    The kindness of my friends.
    I know there is one thing true:
    Even at most alone
    We are more than merely ourselves;
    Our souls are not our own.

    (*thirled: not thrilled but a Scots word meaning tied or bonded to)

    We can be ourselves, we need to be ourselves, but without others around us, to support us and more importantly to support them, then our existence – and our independence – are meaningless. Were that not true, you would not have written your article, I would not be sitting here writing this, and you would not be reading it. 🙂

    Like

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