Love, abhor?

“Love the sinner, abhor the sin.” Okaaaay- what does your “love” actually mean? Love is an ever fixed mark, which looks on tempests and is never shaken. So not an emotional response, possibly a restraint of an emotional response.

I find it easy to mock people who say this. They “love” me by knowing exactly what I need to do and avoid, and telling me that. I think I am a better judge of it. Before I transitioned, I thought I might be reverted within five years, trying to live male again- but I needed to go this way in order to find that was right. Walk a mile in my shoes before telling me what to do: one is flat, the other high-heeled. Loving me means treating me as an adult, independent person and allowing me to make my own mistakes; and for them, loving means wanting an ideal, unchanging Best for me.

My exercise, then, is to find value in the Love- and the abhorrence: for I loathe homophobia. Can I Love the person while abhorring the sin? Can I separate out my own emotional reaction to the sin, bracket it, and love the person? That would mean restricting the ways in which I opposed the sin.

Someone called “Ann Coulter said “Liberals always think of Christ as some pantywaist”. It means, effeminate person. The world is divided between those who emphasise “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone” in Jesus’ words, and those who emphasise “Go, and sin no more”. But Jesus said both. So the liberal can construct from Jesus’ words a Jesus who looks like him- forbearing, self-sacrificing- and the conservative can also find a congenial Jesus. I can find ways of explaining away the bits of Jesus I do not like, but it might be better to live with them, allow them to be, and not rush to an understanding of them.

Ann Coulter quickly repels me; and I want to see her spirit, intelligence and articulacy, and delight in them, while despising the causes to which she devotes them.

9 thoughts on “Love, abhor?

    • Welcome, Kip, and thank you for commenting.

      I picked on Ann Coulter because of her homophobia, most too revolting to quote. I am sorry if that was not obvious.

      I had a look at your blog, and find you call Hitler a “liberal”. In what sense is Hitler a liberal?


        • It is a cultural difference, I am sure.

          Mine is a far smaller and more homogeneous country, and our politics is consensual: the two main parties fight over the centre ground, theorising that there they will find the swing voters. Perhaps Barack Obama would feel more comfortable in our Conservative party than our Labour party: though internationally it is more difficult, as the Labour Mr Blair worked with the Republican Mr Bush. When I read someone asserting seriously that God sends hurricanes because some Americans support equal marriage, I see that satirical exaggeration ceases to be possible.

          Honestly, leave the insane Rightwing gibberish to insane Rightwingers. There are enough of them, it seems.


  1. There are other sources for the words and teachings of Jesus. His words in the Bible were recorded by the apostles, who often acted out of fear – believing in sin, hell, repentance and all that jazz. What Jesus is most likely to have said was, “Go and love one another”.

    Only the love is real and that is what endures.

    Here endeth the lesson – amen.

    I rejoice in the clarity of your expression, dear Clare. Thank you, again!

    XXX 🙂


    • The sayings of Jesus passed through several people before reaching their current form, and Matthew in particular seems happy to alter what is in Mark, which appears to have been his source. And yet- how could we know what Jesus said or did, and which reading to reject? Is it just we reject the bits we don’t like, with the test dressed up as internal consistency, morality or value?


  2. Maybe it’s easier to think of it in terms of not hating a person because their experience of life leads them to have silly ideas e.g. homophobia. Its irrational and I guess when I think about it I feel sorry for people that have had such a weird in experience in life that they cannot see it.


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